Addict Gazza is hooked on sweets

ENGLAND legend Paul Gascoigne has described “the pain” of knowing he might start drinking again even though he recognises it might kill him – and has turned his addictive personality to an addiction to sweets.
A new documentary about the former England footballer reveals he is now addicted to the sweet treats, and that he spends £1,000 a year on anti-wrinkle jabs to counteract the ravages of drinking.
Gascoigne, who played for teams including Newcastle United and Tottenham Hotspur, was followed by a film crew for three months for an ITV documentary after his return from a treatment clinic in the United States where he overheard doctors say he might die.
The 46-year-old told the filmmakers: “I just remember one bit after the third day of being in hospital when he said ‘I don’t think this guy is going to make it’ and I sort of put my head up a little bit and I was like, tubes in my arms and an oxygen tank injecting round my heart and lungs and that. I just come forward and I went ‘I don’t want to die I need to water the plants’ and that was it and then I woke up two weeks later.”
Gascoigne, who describes himself as “an addictive personality”, said: “With me now if I did have a drink and relapse, it’s like becoming tipsy and merry is okay for a couple of days but like the next mouthful I’m so down, I’m so depressed, I cry. I do all that because I know inside I’m hurting myself again. I know where I’m heading, a wooden box. Or I’m back in treatment or hospital. Or getting sectioned.”

Lukaku didn’t know he’d scored

ROMELU Lukaku scored for Everton today – but he was the only person in the stadium that missed it.
The on-loan Belgian notched for the Toffees, but in the process the striker was knocked out.
He said: “I remember nothing about it. I did not even know I had scored, that was the first thing I asked the doc
“I said “who scored?” He said “you”.”

Spying coach was dressed ‘like Rambo’

A COACH for Italian club Genoa was caught spying in on rivals Sampdoria ahead of their next match dressed “like Rambo”.
Youth team coach Luca De Pra has been suspended after he was spotted lurking in a wooded area close to Sampdoria’s training base in full military gear.
Genoa have said that the coach was acting alone and not carrying out an official spying mission.
Sampdoria said in a statement: “That the derby is a question of nerve, tactics and strategy we already knew, but frankly we could never expect that it could turn into an scene of espionage.
“Like Rambo hidden among the branches on the hill, Luca De Pra, Genoa goalkeeping coach and man of noble footballing ancestry, failed to overcome Sampdoria’s intelligence and counter intelligence operations.
“However, no prisoners were taken, and no blood was shed.
“Once tracked down and caught red-handed, the opposing side’s soldier was let free to return to base.
“You should always forgive your enemies, as nothing annoys them more.”

Did spelling mistake deny Sessegnon his debut this weekend?

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WHILE West Brom manager Steve Clarke was able to give debuts to new signings Victor Anichebe and Morgan Amalfitano, Stephane Sessegnon missed out due to a “glitch” in his work permit application – rumoured to be that his name was spelt wrongly on the form.
The Benin international was unable to take the field against Fulham this Saturday, andalthough the spelling error was not confirmed, his new boss said: “When you transfer from one club to another you have to re-apply for your work permit.
“There was a little glitch in the process yesterday that delayed it and unfortunately for us he was not available for this game.
“Hopefully it will be resolved over the weekend or early next week at the latest and he’ll be available to face his old club Sunderland next Saturday.”
I bet whoever filled out that form feels a right plokner now.

Shevchenko becomes professional golfer

FORMER AC Milan and Chelsea striker Andriy Shevchenko, former European Footballer of the Year, is to make his professional golfing debut today.
The 36-year-old Ukrainian is to take part in golf’s Challenge Tour at the Kharkov Superior Cup in his home nation, after getting a special invitation to the event.
He said: “This is the first big event for me and of course it is the first event in Ukraine so it’s a huge event for golf in this country.
“I have played with many good players in pro-ams but this is different. I hope I play well…but I just want to have a good time and enjoy the week.
“It’s quite different to football alright. I started to play golf to escape from the pressure from football.
“I come on to a golf course and turn off my phone and just walk the course and hit some balls. It’s one of the reasons why I started to play. I just found this great game where you have to be focused and balanced and that’s why I like it. I like that mental balance.”

Get Messi out say Barca fans

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ARGENTINEAN superstar Leo Messi isn’t wanted at Barcelona by a proportion of the Spanish club’s fans.
Two per cent of them to be exact.
Despite scoring a 220 league goals in 248 matches and helping Barcelona win more trophies than I’ve had hot dinners, a recent poll has shown that two per cent of Bracelona fans don’t want their star striker at the club.
Barca’s president Sandro Rosell: “In the club we do internal polling and there is two per cent who do not like Messi.
“I would like to know these two per cent.”

German physio was injured treating a player

DURING Germany’s three goal win over Austria, physio Klaus Eder ran onto the pitch to treat a player and ended up needing treatment to two injuries himself.
Eder, who has worked for the German federation for 25 years, tore a muscle in his left leg as he went to tend to Marcel Schmelzer, causing him to fall over – and when he fell, he then broke a finger.
“I now have to put into practice what I always tell my patients,” the 60-year-old told the German federation’s website on Sunday. “Patience is important and you should not expect a lot of progress too soon.
“The way the players reacted was very comforting.
“Philipp Lahm brought me the ice pack, Mesut Ozil and Miroslav Klose held me and led me off the field.”